A Love Story...or Two
It's wintry and damp and cold outside -- the kind of weather that makes a bird feeder a welcome sight if you happen to be a bird. It's been a little over a year now that Scott purchased the feeder for me -- in hopes of attracting my beloved cardinals. While Jim, my husband's co-worker, snaps photo after photo of the multitudes of birds -- cardinals included -- that visit his country home backyard, we rejoice in each random, occasional visit we happen to catch from our handsome red bird and his demure little wife.
If you've known me for very long, you know I name EVERYTHING. My little red car is named Scarlet. My running shoes are Micaela (right shoe) and Antonio (left shoe). Our GPS is named Gypsy. You get the picture. Anyway, this year, and after the saddest few weeks of my life, I decided to name our cardinal couple, and they are now affectionately known as Calvin and Alice. Isn't that endearing?!
Well, if you know who Calvin and Alice are, yes, indeed, that is VERY endearing. Calvin Trillin is a writer who lost his wife Alice in 2001 -- on September 11, no less -- to heart failure. Calvin is the author of multiple books, and Alice was always included in his writings -- so much so that the world began to take notice not only of his entertaining writing style but also how much he adored his wife. Rebecca Traister, a writer for Salon magazine, wrote, "I grew up loving Alice because her husband loved her so eloquently."
In 2007, Calvin's book About Alice was published. It was an expansion of an essay in memory of Alice that had been published in The New Yorker. It was the cherry on the top of Calvin's literary fan base. Women -- and men -- were swept up in the romance and grief of a beautiful love story ended too soon. Calvin's blatant admiration for his talented, brilliant, lovable wife had won hearts in every one of his works, but this final tribute was the watershed piece for devoted readers. Katy McColl, lifestyle editor at Jane magazine, wrote a condolence letter to Calvin after reading About Alice. She confessed to Calvin that his adoration for Alice had become a gold standard for men that she dated. She would eventually end up asking herself, "But will he love me like Calvin loves Alice?"
I ran across an article about the book shortly after it was published, and Katy's question was included. I cut out the article and gave it to Scott with a little handwritten note to the effect that I would ALWAYS know that he loved me like Calvin loved Alice. He took that article to his office, and I was surprised to see it on display when I stopped by his work a few years later.
Well, fast forward a bit. This stereotypical "daddy's girl" -- even at the age of 51 -- has had a rough couple of weeks. Dad went to Heaven on February 11, and even though his health had been declining for months, the finality of it all has broken my heart. Several days later, we lost Callaway, our Yorkie mix doggie that could fit into a coffee cup when we first brought him home 15 1/2 years earlier. And in the middle of it all was my husband -- taking care of me in the most thoughtful, tender, practical, serving ways you can imagine -- and some you can't. When I could only pace and cry and try to talk, he helped me to get my thoughts together and pack and make plans. He made phone calls that needed to be made. He let me cry and drip my snotty nose on his pretty, clean dress shirt and didn't say a word -- just let me sob till I couldn't sob any longer. He held my hand and brushed away my tears with his hands while I cried some more in the quiet of the night. He was clear-headed and generous and kind. He welcomed and loved members of my family that he had only met a few times like he'd known them his whole life. He was diplomatic and compassionate in awkward situations. He purposely turned off my alarm without me knowing it because he knew I needed to rest. He did ALL of the laundry while I wrote notes and texts and emails that needed to go out. When Callaway died at home and I was away for the night helping to take care of one of our granddaughters, he was left to carry Callaway's little body in his favorite blanket to the vet for cremation. And his tender heart came through in his phone call to me that morning.
He has shielded me from hard things and has helped me to see things in a brighter light. He has pointed me to the Lord over and over again for comfort and hope and strength. He has been to me what the Lord intends for a husband to be to his wife. He has poured out himself to protect and care for me in the most selfless ways. And yes, this has been very apparent in the last few weeks. But this is and always has been his heart for me for the 31-plus years we've been married and even before.
Looking for your true love? Here's a test. Ask yourself, "But will he love me like Scott loves Tiffany?'
If you've known me for very long, you know I name EVERYTHING. My little red car is named Scarlet. My running shoes are Micaela (right shoe) and Antonio (left shoe). Our GPS is named Gypsy. You get the picture. Anyway, this year, and after the saddest few weeks of my life, I decided to name our cardinal couple, and they are now affectionately known as Calvin and Alice. Isn't that endearing?!
Well, if you know who Calvin and Alice are, yes, indeed, that is VERY endearing. Calvin Trillin is a writer who lost his wife Alice in 2001 -- on September 11, no less -- to heart failure. Calvin is the author of multiple books, and Alice was always included in his writings -- so much so that the world began to take notice not only of his entertaining writing style but also how much he adored his wife. Rebecca Traister, a writer for Salon magazine, wrote, "I grew up loving Alice because her husband loved her so eloquently."
In 2007, Calvin's book About Alice was published. It was an expansion of an essay in memory of Alice that had been published in The New Yorker. It was the cherry on the top of Calvin's literary fan base. Women -- and men -- were swept up in the romance and grief of a beautiful love story ended too soon. Calvin's blatant admiration for his talented, brilliant, lovable wife had won hearts in every one of his works, but this final tribute was the watershed piece for devoted readers. Katy McColl, lifestyle editor at Jane magazine, wrote a condolence letter to Calvin after reading About Alice. She confessed to Calvin that his adoration for Alice had become a gold standard for men that she dated. She would eventually end up asking herself, "But will he love me like Calvin loves Alice?"
I ran across an article about the book shortly after it was published, and Katy's question was included. I cut out the article and gave it to Scott with a little handwritten note to the effect that I would ALWAYS know that he loved me like Calvin loved Alice. He took that article to his office, and I was surprised to see it on display when I stopped by his work a few years later.
Well, fast forward a bit. This stereotypical "daddy's girl" -- even at the age of 51 -- has had a rough couple of weeks. Dad went to Heaven on February 11, and even though his health had been declining for months, the finality of it all has broken my heart. Several days later, we lost Callaway, our Yorkie mix doggie that could fit into a coffee cup when we first brought him home 15 1/2 years earlier. And in the middle of it all was my husband -- taking care of me in the most thoughtful, tender, practical, serving ways you can imagine -- and some you can't. When I could only pace and cry and try to talk, he helped me to get my thoughts together and pack and make plans. He made phone calls that needed to be made. He let me cry and drip my snotty nose on his pretty, clean dress shirt and didn't say a word -- just let me sob till I couldn't sob any longer. He held my hand and brushed away my tears with his hands while I cried some more in the quiet of the night. He was clear-headed and generous and kind. He welcomed and loved members of my family that he had only met a few times like he'd known them his whole life. He was diplomatic and compassionate in awkward situations. He purposely turned off my alarm without me knowing it because he knew I needed to rest. He did ALL of the laundry while I wrote notes and texts and emails that needed to go out. When Callaway died at home and I was away for the night helping to take care of one of our granddaughters, he was left to carry Callaway's little body in his favorite blanket to the vet for cremation. And his tender heart came through in his phone call to me that morning.
He has shielded me from hard things and has helped me to see things in a brighter light. He has pointed me to the Lord over and over again for comfort and hope and strength. He has been to me what the Lord intends for a husband to be to his wife. He has poured out himself to protect and care for me in the most selfless ways. And yes, this has been very apparent in the last few weeks. But this is and always has been his heart for me for the 31-plus years we've been married and even before.
Looking for your true love? Here's a test. Ask yourself, "But will he love me like Scott loves Tiffany?'
